It’s no secret that I have been floundering all over the place with weight loss and fitness. I know I am up, up, up on the scale even though I haven’t been on one in forever. I have been in such a “whatever” state of mind in regards to my eating for the better part of a year now. Long are the days of feeling confident and strong in my skin. Getting dressed in the morning is such a chore, trying to decide what to wear is exhausting.
I am run down and tired. No doubt this is from the lack of structure I have when it comes to my health and fitness. It also doesn’t help that I am so freaking busy all the time and work is exhausting.
I think back to the days of getting up and making a good-for-me breakfast. Now coffee is my breakfast. Being on the road so much for work makes it next to impossible to plan and pack for lunch, just not knowing where the day is going to take me. That turns into eating on the fly, whatever is fast and easy. Dinner is my favorite meal of the day, the one I enjoy cooking, but it could be better for us. And, in our home, there is nightly dessert. It’s what we do.
And then I remember the days of getting up early and running before work because it just would not happen afterwards. Where did the drive and motivation go? I have turned into a lazy blob in the mornings, not getting up until I absolutely have to. In reality, I have PLENTY of time in the morning to get a workout in. But I don’t. I think about it, but I always too comfy to get up and do it.
I was chatting online briefly with my friend Haley the other day and I mentioned my lack of activity. She is training for another marathon and I told her what a rock star she was. She mentioned that for her, it keeps her motivated. Having something bigger on her calendar keeps her focused. And she does this with two little kiddos at home. This has been on my mind a lot since she said that. Hence this long-winded post.
I don’t – and won’t – have anything as big as a full marathon on my calendar. Remember when I said one and done? I still very much feel that way. But what I need is a plan like I am training for something. Maybe not a specific race or event, but just life in general.
I texted my friend Corinna the other day and asked her if she wanted to run with us on Sunday. We haven’t done this in forever. Between hubby’s knee and my lack of energy, it just hasn’t happened. My exact words to her were “Thoughts on running Sunday morning? And by run, I mean probably a lot of walking. I need to get my fat a$$ back out there.” I *know* I shouldn’t talk about myself that way, but I was being serious and honest. Fortunately, she said she’s in and we have a plan for tomorrow morning. Lord help me if it rains because we have a running date and I’ll be bummed if Mother Nature ruins my first plan in forever to get out there and run.
There is absolutely no reason I can’t make a plan to run 3 days a week. I don’t have to run 5 days a week like when I was marathon training. A good Sunday run, and then two during the week.
Despite my whatever attitude that I’ve had, I miss running. I miss the feeling. I miss loving the running. I want all of that back. I need to get back to it because mostly it makes me feel strong and reminds me that I can tackle just about anything.
Keeping it real, I need a plan. And a plan I will make. To start with, three days a week I will be active. And I will get back to eating breakfast again to start my day right. I need to enjoy my favorite foods and beverages in moderation. Red moscato and beer are favorites of mine. I don’t need to not have it, I just need to not drink it so often. Much like a big bowl of ice cream every night – I don’t *need* it. I’ve been down this road before (and I freaking hate that I am back here again) – I know what I need to do. Right now, the biggest challenge I have is convincing myself that I can make the changes that I need to make. Changes that I’ve made before. Changes that I know work.
The good news is, hubby and I can do this together. We can motivate each other and it will be quality time spent together as we take better care of ourselves.
Keeping it real. It’s time to get to work.